Right now I’m watching MTV for like the first time in years. It’s this TV show called “Made” and they have this 15 year old socially inept girl who wants to be a beauty queen. She’s nuts for doing all this on television, but hey, then she gets all this training for free.
Anyway, it got me to thinking cause this girl’s not ugly she’s just a bit overweight. She’s got these killer blue eyes with an equally killer smile. So I started thinking about the beauty standard.
I don’t think I’m ugly and I don’t think anybody would say that about me either. I’d go as far as to say I’m pretty and I think if you took a poll people might say I’m anything from average to beautiful. But I know I look nothing like the standard nor am I movie star beautiful.
Now sometimes I can accept that and just thank god that I’m pretty cause really, I got a good deal in the body department. At the same time there are moments when I’m completely self conscious about the way I look because I’m not the standard barbie doll of beauty.
We’ve all heard the term “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” and you may have heard me or Chris Rock say that “it don’t matter how beautiful a woman is, there’s some guy out there who’s tired of fucking her.” I think that’s a good argument for making yourself feel okay with not baring resemblance to Pamela Anderson. If I can’t keep a man interested by looking as good as Halle Berry or Uma Thurman then there’s got to be more to life than just beauty.
And if you’re dieting or just trying to upkeep looking good everyone always says “oh, as long as you’re doing it for you and not for anyone else”. Yeah, right. No one goes through a brazilian bikini wax so they can feel better about themselves while showering or masturbating. You do it for whoever you’re fucking, hope to get fucked by or to look better than whatever woman is fucking the guy you want. I didn’t stop drinking soda to be healthy, I did it to succumb to the ideal. So fess up everyone. We diet and wax and go that extra mile to look good to everyone in our surroundings.
Being healthier is just an added benefit. More often than not, it’s not the reason. Otherwise, why on earth would women wear high heels. There’s no benefit to them whatsoever, only drawbacks. The only benefit is making our legs look good.
I’m living the lie and I know it. But in this society, being beautiful on the inside is not enough.