Mr. Dammnit

I went to church yesterday. Gasp! I’m till rubbing burn ointment on myself. JK.

No, I went because my mom is on a rampage about baptizing my kid which I’m totally fine with. You know, just in case it does matter she won’t automatically go to that circle of hell from Dante’s Inferno. And really, does it make a difference? She can make up her own mind when she’s older.

Unfortunately, this also means I’m stuck going to church on Sundays until this is all over. That’s 3 more times. I find it’s a lot like going to school where I kind of sit there and stare into space. I take my cue from other people about what we’re suppose to be doing (sitting, standing, kneeling). I’m staring at my watch.

I feel bad about not having it the way my mom did for me where she took me around to churches and let me pick one. The problem is most churches want you to attend their church regularly for months, give lots of money, have the godparents come too, donate a kidney, end world hunger, and suck Mel Gibson’s cock before they let you baptise your kid there.

So we ended up where my family normally does if we must go to church, with the Epsicopals. They seem like really nice people and not at all like the weirdos I normally see getting out of church. And the Reverend is pretty cute. (I’m going to hell).

But this will be the end of my kid’s religious adventures, at least on my end. I just don’t want to tell her anything about it while at the same time not shelter her from it. I’m secretly afraid the Episcopals will realize my kid has no concept of God, any god, or anything at all like that.


wish me luck!


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