I’ve been busy.
Once November started so did NaNo and my “plot” has been hanging on by a thin thread all month. Truly, the book is it’s own entity and has very little to do with me. I write, get bored, and kill another character, but I think my novel is on to me. It’s been very careful not to let me get bored and suddenly as I write, lost in a fuzzy at best plot, a character will say something to another character and open a whole new Pandora’s box of possibilities.
It’s been a rather strange month. For example, as I write this, Neil Gaiman is speaking the words out loud in my head as I type. Sorry, Neil, surely you have better things to do with your time.
I’m moving. And as I explained to the guy at the furniture store, after my ex and I split up, I put my furniture in storage where it was soon then stolen. That was seven years ago, so technically the thieves did me a favor because it would have been stupid to have furniture in storage for seven years. The money I would have spent could have gone to new furniture. And so it has. I’ve been hitting the furniture stores and biting my nails.
It’s hard starting all over even though I’ve been saving my money exactly for this moment. I had to make up a list of everything I needed and it’s overwhelming. I’ve been online constantly trying to look at furniture, finding best deals, thinking about their size, do the colors match, what’s best for the long run… just for a one bedroom apartment. I’m exhausted and excited. I’m confident and terrified.
I had a whole discussion with my mother about circular vs. rectangular dining tables. She prefers circular and says it’s good luck. I like rectangular because you can shove it up against a wall easier. At some point I said something to the effect “if I fuck up my life again and have to move somewhere smaller then it’ll be better to have a table that’s more compact.” I worry that a loveseat is too much because what if I fail at life again and just wasted a few hundred bucks? Where would I store all my new furniture?
It’s a little hard to wrap my brain around the fact that I finally got my life back together to a level where I’m not so terribly embarrassed about it anymore.